The scary truth about Ostriches
It's well known that ostriches are the biggest fowl (bird) in the world, but you might be surprised to know they're all the fastest egg-laying animals too, reaching speeds of 75 mph! The ostrich is able to reach these speeds due to it's long
The man who found a shoe
There once was a man who found a shoe, but hidden inside was a piece of poo. He tried it on and to his delight, it fit perfectly it was just right! He hurried home to show his wife, "that's the stinkiest shoe I've ever
The Man From Nantucket
There once was a man from Nantucket, who found a syringe in a bucket. It was covered in crud and a bunch of old blood, and he was like meh whatever fuck it.
A condom made of lace
I once wore a condom made of lace, I tried it in a safe space. But amidst the jerk it didn't quite work, as some cum ended up on my face.
Joel Westman's mustache
Joel Westman had a wife named Betty. She grew tired of his mustache however, so every evening while he slept she'd take tweezers and pluck just one hair out. One night at a time, one hair at a time, Joel was slowly losing his mustache. But one day
How To Stop Egg Salad From Slipping Through The Hole Of Your Bagel
To address this problem we first need to understand the bagel. The bagel, while tasty, has a fundamental flaw; a big gaping hole in the center. One could argue that egg salad isn't the only food filling suceptible to falling through this crator. So why the hole? (And
Christmas Eve in Dodgetown
As Christmas Eve fell upon the sleepy town of Dodgetown, all it's residents gathered at the local church. Pastor Blanton had a long-standing tradition of giving his sermon past midnight, and into the wee hours of the morning so that Billy McDoogle, the jolly town drunk, had time
The Owl
Once upon a time a on a family farm just east of Omaha Nebraska, The Stephenson's sat around a campfire as they did each Sunday evening. Rain or shine, this was their longstanding tradition. They'd tell stories, talk about their week, and pray for one another&
The Popcorn Killer
One wintery evening as the Patterson family went to bed, little Bridgette lay awake eating popcorn, and pondering all the wonders of life - her loving family, the leaves blowing in the wind, the vast oceans. There wasn't one thing she could think of that wasn't
The Pig Man In The Window
The sky was blue and the sun was out, a beautiful morning without a doubt. A stroll around the neighborhood, a fresh breeze and cedar wood. I passed a house and what did I see? A figure in the window looking at me. But a normal person it was not,
The Campfire
There once was a campfire at night, but something felt not quite right. As smoke tendrils rose up the owls nose, the forest got a bit too bright.